Monday, May 18, 2009

Stayyyyy out of the Marsh!

I've been cracking myself up at that joke all weekend, although very few people in my everyday life actually get it. It's not even a joke, really, it's an impression of a character on a ride at Six Flags over Georgia, sort of an inside joke between my sisters and me from way back in the days we used to spend our summers wearing out our Six Flags season passes.

I took my Brownie troop camping in East Texas this weekend, which is the source of my marsh musings, and also the source of my so-tired-I'm-loopy sense of humor, making jokes that are only funny to me and then laughing endlessly at them. We had a really good time, and got really wet in the rain, and ate lots of marshmallows. The end.

Except for this: I have a nice tent that I have been using for about two years now. When I got the tent, I waterproofed it. The top of the tent is made out of screen material, and waterproofing that is ineffective. The tent comes with a rain fly, a cover to put over the top of the tent in case of rain. It never occurred to me to waterproof the rain fly. I reasoned that a product whose sole purpose is to protect the tent from rain would be, I don't know, water repellent.

I was very very wrong.

Dear Tent Manufacturers:

Please do not waste my time and sanity by manufacturing a product whose function is to repel water and whose title implies that its purpose will be fulfilled during the rain, unless you are going to actually go to the trouble of ensuring that the product is water repellent enough to literally repel actual rain. Otherwise you are just selling me a cape for my tent, and my tent does not need a cape.

Love, Chrissy

P.S. Your instructions suck.

Moving on.
Thankfully I had made the girls put all of their belongings in trash bags that morning before we left (a lesson learned from experience, unfortunately), so we bought tarps at the store and ghettoed up the tent, and all was well. I don't really have lots of pictures to share on the blog, since they're all of other people's children, but I will leave you with this:
I have never shared with you the extent of my marshmallow roasting talents because I value modesty. However, it is not an understatement to say that I am the champion of marshmallow roasting, and have been for over 15 years. No one can challenge me. My skill cannot be matched. That is all.


  1. Now I've got that song stuck inside my head. "You're invited..."

    You should try caulking around the mesh of your tent for insulation.

  2. WENDY. The rain just came straight through the fabric of that thing. It was like I had covered my tent with Kleenex. I was SO MAD about it. I've scotchgarded it now and I'm going to take the hose to it and see what happens.

  3. Your letter to the tent company is hilarious.

    Those marshmallows look DELISH. Mmmm. I went on a GS camping trip, I remember it being fun, minus the whole in-the-woods part. LOL.

  4. We took the kids to Fernbank a few weekends ago and the had a whole section that looked like the "MARSH". Bobby and I sang and laughed. Our kids however, did not get it!

  5. I bow to your marshmallow roasting prowess. Kyla and I are of like minds about how camping would be fun if it wasn't well...camping. But this post cracked me up. You crack me up. And "Stayyy out of the Marsh!" is not one bit lost on me chicka!

  6. i would like the marshmallow on the left. thank you.

  7. I knew exactly what you were saying when you said Stay out of the Marsh! Oh Six Flags memories! I can still see that Monster Sheriff shaking his head and saying "don't you humans ever listen, alright, this way out" as we humans come shamefully out of the Marsh he told us not to go it.
    Please, please mail your letter to the tent company!!

  8. Anonymous is Cousin-in-law Emily! :)


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